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Gaming with a Kitten

There's something to be said about the camaraderie that is shared between gamers. You are thrown into a randomly selected team with individuals of all different ages, races and walks of life. There's an instant bond of trust between you all. You will win. You will be victorious. You will rule the leaderboard.

You make a push, brothers and sisters at your side, firearms at the ready. A cry goes up from your right as one of your own is taken out. Responsive fire from your left removes the threat and you continue with your gallant effort, mourning the loss with your bullets, seeking revenge with your blade.

Shots are fired left, right and centre. You dodge, bob and weave, avoiding the bullets and responding accordingly. A grenade flies past your head, narrowly missing your left ear. The explosive detonates, destroying an enemy you hadn't seen. You smile inwardly and venture on.

An unknown combatant leaps out from behind cover. You're caught completely off guard, your heart sinks and your enemy takes his aim. You hear the shots but do not fall. Instead, your assailant drops his weapon and crumbles to the grounds and as you let out a sigh of relief, your loyal teammates rush past you. Coming to your senses, you follow suit, close behind and vow not to make the same mistake twice.

More and more enemies go down and up goes your teams score. You're winning and there's no stopping you now. You're a raging bull, a speeding bullet, a thermal detonator.

You round a corner and see it. You're teammate is facing the wrong way and an enemy has appeared behind him, ready to strike. Now is your chance. This is what you were brought here to do. You ready your sights and take aim at your target's head. Your trigger finger twitches and fires but you're back pedalling and turning in a circle. Your shots miss, you crouch, then go prone and take a screenshot.

"Meow". All is lost. He has died and it's all your fa- "Meeooow". You can't believe you failed your mission, left your brothers and sisters in their time of n- "Jesus Christ, stop scratching my hand! Fine I'll feed you!".

It's not easy trying to game with a brand new, teeny weeny kitty in your household. If she's not begging for attention or scrounging for food, she's sprawled over the very equipment you're fruitlessly trying to use. You can put her on the floor, the bed, the sofa, but in the end, your little bundle of cuteness and joy will always end up slap bang in the centre of your keyboard, pawing at the movement of your mouse on the screen.

In the end though, you're never going to get angry at her. You're going to let her remain where she is, pressing multiple buttons at once and telling your friends "erifgjhn". You'll make your excuses and apologise for her but you won't move her; because if you do, she'll just look up at you with those big ol' eyes of sorrow and say "meow".

Kaostic | 17th September, 2013
Fat Tony's picture
Quote:
Your shots miss, you crouch, then go prone and take a screenshot.
*dies in lol*
Kaostic's picture
I can only assume it's happened to you :P
Cronos's picture
I've died many a time at the paws of my cat spamming the keyboard or kicking the mouse.
Kaostic's picture
As you can see in the picture, mine likes to just put her paws on the keys or roll around behind the keyboard, occasionally landing on buttons.

She'll also just sit on Harrie's or my brothers laptop keyboard.

And if that's not bad enough, she'll sit and watch what I'm doing and then attack the cursor or something moving on the screen. It's cute as hell but I am not letting no punk ass kitty scratch my £350 monitors..
Misterwoot's picture
Try gaming with a 3 foot long Asian Water dragon (it's his face in the avatar). thankfully, he spends almost all his time in the Vivarium

The 4 Devon Rex cats also "help", and have caused more raid wipes than I care to relate.
Kaostic's picture
Quote:
Originally Posted by Misterwoot View Post
Try gaming with a 3 foot long Asian
This would make for a much better story.

Although yours doesn't sound very fun.
Fat Tony's picture
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaostic View Post
I can only assume it's happened to you :P
Furzton will literally lay on the Xbox controller if he thinks I'm not paying him enough attention, regardless as to whether I'm in the middle of a game or not.

Quote:
And if that's not bad enough, she'll sit and watch what I'm doing and then attack the cursor or something moving on the screen.
Shadow goes nuts for the game Feeding Frenzy. Oh good god that game oh god

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